In the South, White Bass are extremely common — and popular sportfish. Here on the West Coast, however, they only exist in a couple lakes…Having never fished these exotics in their native lands, Reilly and I decided to see what all the hype was about, so we put the super secret, under-the-radar FishWithJD skiff in the water and went on a little fact-finding mission. Bottom line: while not huge, these little critters that look like mutant striper x crappie hybrids are a blast to catch…

Artwork: Dmitry Bogdanov

Okay, so here’s yet another reason I need that time machine jet sled: So I can go back to the late Miocene epoch, (about 20 plus million years ago) and fish for oncorhynchus rastrosus, otherwise known as the “Sabertooth Salmon.”

This big boy was up to 10 feet long and weighed 300 to 400 pounds. As if that weren’t bad ass enough, ol’ rastrosus rocked some huge 4-inch fangs that extended down from the top of his jaw (bust out the wire leaders and titanium Kwikfish!).

Apparently the Sabertooth Salmon was anadramous, as fossilized remains have been found in central Oregon and in coastal rivers in California. Oddly enough, scientists think that this monster may have actually been a plankton feeder when at sea, suggesting that it was a relative to modern day chum or sockeye. Plankton feeder or not, I’m thinking Kevlar waders may have been in order back in the day!

Here’s what wacky and wonderful wildlife artist Ray Troll thinks it might have looked like (notice the “chummy” resemblance)…

www.trollart.com

Curtis “Exotic Species” Wilson seems to have a habit of stumbling onto some rare fish in Northern California’s waters. This time, the man they call “Turkey” was prospecting for kings on the Mad River near Arcata, when this wayward pink “hit.” Pinks of course, are extremely rare south of Washington State and it’s the first one anybody can remember on the Mad.

If you recall, Wilson was also the proud angler who caught a sockeye in the Trinity River last year. See the pic HERE

The GLoomis rod company’s slogan is “Fear no Fish,” which is fine when you’re dealing with species like salmon, trout, steelhead and bass. But, there are truly some fish out there you should fear. Some will eat you; others will sting or bite you to death. And one will even swim up inside your very sensitive body parts!

Here are some of the fish you need to stay away from…

Stone Fish

So, the next time you’re out wandering around the Great Barrier Reef at low tide and you step on what appears to be a sharp rock…look again. You’ve probably just accidentally impaled yourself on the extremely venomous spines of one of the world’s most deadly fish — the stonefish.

By the way, I'm not a rock...oops...too late for you!

These ambush predators look a lot like rocks and use that camouflage to help them catch prey. If you still have your wits about you, take a closer look and you’ll notice a row of 13 spines along the fish’s back. Of course, by now the excruciating pain and tremendous swelling is probably all you can think about…

Depending on how well you stuck yourself, you may experience weakness, temporary paralysis and shock….and, oh yea, maybe even death. Our best advice: get to the doc immediately!

Candirú

Reason #1 not to swim in the Amazon (as if you really needed one): The Candirú. While he’s only a few inches long, this little relative of the catfish can bring a world of hurt.

Attracted to urine and blood, the candirú can find its way into your bathing suit and then, um…how shall we say this…uh, swims “upstream” through any opening in the body (and I’m not talking anything above the waist here!). Once in “there,” he erects his spine to hold himself in place and goes about his business — which just happens to be feeding on blood and tissue. YEEEEEOOOOOWWWW!

You don't want me swimming where the sun don't shine!

In most cases, you’ll have to have this little bugger removed surgically…which can’t be a whole lot of fun, either.

Moral of the story: Don’t swim in the Amazon and if you do, don’t pee!!

Great White Shark

After hearing about the Candirú, dealing with a great white almost sounds like a better option. Until you consider that these toothy monsters are one of nature’s most perfect predators and can reach 20 feet in length and 4,300 pounds. Enough said!

Ba-bum...ba-bumpa....ba bumpa

Blue-Ringed Octopus

You’re starting to have a difficult time seeing and it feels like you’re going to puke. Then, you can’t see a thing and speaking becomes a chore. In a matter of moments, you’re paralized and taking a breath is next to impossible. And the really bad news is you may be dead in a few minutes.

I may look like a harmless laval lamp, but...

What the heck happened?

Technically speaking, Tetrodotoxin is coursing through your blood stream, causing motor paralysis and, sometimes, respiratory arrest…which, of course, can lead to a heart attack.

In layman’s terms, you’ve just been bitten by a blue-ringed octopus and, hate to bring this up but, there’s no known antidote.

Obviously it’s a good idea know where all your appendages are when you’re messing around in shallow reefs and tide pools from northern Australia to Japan!

Australian Box Jellyfish

So, there you are, snorkeling just off the beach on your Australian vacation enjoying all the colorful fish when suddenly you feel a pain so overwhelming that you can’t see straight. You’ve just been formally introduced to the Australian Box Jellyfish. If you’re alone, you’re probably going to become a permanent resident of Davy Jones’ Locker as the pain will soon send you into shock and perhaps cardiac arrest (not good!).

The stingers on the tentacles of the box jelly have cardiotoxic, neurotoxic and dermatonecrotic effects on humans. In English this means, you’re going to have issues with your heart, skin and nervous system if you get stung!

If you somehow make it out of the water (highly unlikely), you’re going to need to inactivate the remaining stinging cells by pouring vinegar on the affected area. But what a story you’ll have for the folks back home!

Look what turned up on Lake Shasta the other day…200+ pounds of dinosaur! Dan Frost was fishing in a bass tournament when he stumbled across this big ol’ slab of white meat. The crazy thing is, this fish probably lived in the Sacramento River before Shasta Dam was built!

Too bad it didn’t count in the tourney…now that’s a kicker fish!!

Read the entire story here: Redding Record Searchlight

Okay, so several of you guys properly identified this species as the long nose lancet fish when it appeared in our Name that Fish Contest. I kinda thought I’d stump ya a little longer that I did, but impress me, you did, Grasshoppers!

Anyway, I received several emails from folks who have seen these things — including one from Ben Rasmussen who was nice enough to pass along some photos of one he found that was still alive near Dillon Beach (about 1.5 hours north of San Francisco).

Check it out…

Hey honey, I heard these were a natural aphrodisiac!!

You can read more about these crazy looking critters HERE

Not two casts into the day on the American River, side-drifting for steelhead, one of my clients (name withheld by request) hooked and landed this nice…er…hen near Rossmoor Bar.

Now, we’ve hooked some strange things on the American River over the years, but ladies undergarments may just take the cake.

After the photo session, a discussion regarding the regulations governing sport-caught lingerie ensued. While the DFG regs booklet had no entries on the subject, we opted to do the right thing — release the bra so that maybe another angler might someday also have the pleasure…

Visitors from another world? Nah…actually just some locals. You see, here in Nor Cal, we’ve got some bizarre, very alien-like critters swimming around in our waters including the sturgeon (above) and then you have the extra creepy looking bat ray…YIKES!!!

Don't forget to floss!

This extremely off-course sockeye salmon turned up in Northern California’s Trinity this fall…only about 500 miles off course…

Curtis Wilson of Arcata, CA hooked the lonely red in the Hoopa Valley area of the lower river — where it stuck out like…well…um…like a lost and very crimson salmon in gin clear water.

Home to Chinook and silver salmon, it’s not every day a sockeye shows up on the Trinity. In fact, the Lake Washington/Cedar River drainage in Seattle is about the southern end of the sockeye’s range these days (though the Columbia River on the Oregon/Washington border used to play host to millions of them back in Lewis & Clark’s day) and they’re really still only thriving in British Columbia and Alaska.

Though extremely rare, it’s not the first time an exotic species turned up in Northern California. In 2002, a handful of pink salmon were taken in the Trinity and Klamath rivers and a couple dozen sockeye also turned up at the Feather River Fish Hatchery in Oroville. A few seasons back, a pair of bright red sockeye was also spotted off the Blue Lake Bride on Nor Cal’s Mad River.